American Idol this week

I was hoping the theme for this week’s AMERICAN IDOL would be “Songs of Passover”. I would have loved to have heard Blake Lewis beatboxing during “Dayenu” or Sanjaya singing “Had Gadya” while wearing long peyis.

As it was, a good night. They’re down to the top 8 and Sanjaya. Tony Bennett offered some great advice… although it’s hard to take anyone seriously wearing a yellow sports jacket. I’m sure most contestants didn’t know who he was. And the ones that did thought, “Oh yeah, the old dude from MTV”.

Blake’s rendition of “Mack the Knife” made me long for Kevin Spacey’s. None of it worked for me. The lounge lizard look and the clunker notes. I thought the judges were kind.

I pictured weird Phil Stacey singing “Night & Day” to a girl just before he cut her up and put her in mason jars.

And Paula thought he was a young Frank Sinatra? Frank Sinatra Jr. maybe. Or Tina.

Michael Buble is a young Frank Sinatra. Phil Stacey is a young Hannibal Lecter.

Melinda Doolittle is in a different league. Like Barry Bonds batting clean-up at a fat man’s picnic.

When Chris Richardson came out in the Sinatra pork pie hat I thought, “uh oh”. Please don’t do “Mrs. Robinson”. (Have you heard Frank’s version of that song? “How’s your bird, Mrs. Robinson? Jilly loves you more than you will know. Whoa whoa whoa. The P.T.A., Mrs. Robinson, won’t approve the way you do your thing. Ding ding ding.”) But he was pleasantly terrific.

You heard it here first: Jordin Sparks could sneak in and become the American Idol. She sings great, has a effervescent personality, and her million dollar smile might be a thirty million vote smile.

Gina Glocksen – Simon was dead on. She’s good but there are three other women who are better. She needs the theme to be Joan Jett week or she’s toast.

Sanjaya – Andy Garcia meets Tinkerbell. America’s joke.

Haley Scarnato went back to her strength – showing off her legs and breasts. Among the many things her performance was lacking was a pole. I mean, when Paula, who is excited when you dangle a piece of string in front of her eyes, can only say “green is a good color on you”, you know you’re in trouble.

And finally, I’m getting tired of LaKisha. Yes, her voice can reach the back row…of the Acropolis, but there are no shadings. Melinda is a singer. LaKisha is a belter.

I’d say Haley and Phil are the bottom two. Maybe Gina. AMERICAN IDOL will adopt the “Passover” theme by passing over Sanjaya for another undeserving week.