My mother the stripper

Hello from Seattle, home of the weirdest plays in baseball. Here’s what happens next in THE SNOBS. For the set-up, please see yesterday’s post.


INT. LIVING ROOM – MOMENTS LATER

KARL AND BEVERLY SIT WITH THE SHAPIROS.

BEVERLY
I guess I got into stripping after my junior year in college. I was told I had the body for it. And all the good summer jobs were taken.

DR. SHAPIRO
(SUDDENLY FULL OF LIFE) So what exactly did you do? Did you have a specific theme or motif?

BEVERLY LOOKS TO KARL.

KARL
Of course she did. You don’t become the “Indiana Stripper of the Year” just by sliding down a pole.

BEVERLY
Now, Karl, don’t brag. (THEN) My motif… well, I was a literature major. So, I’d… ask the customers questions and for every right answer I’d take something off.

DR. SHAPIRO
What kind of questions?

BEVERLY
Well… on stage… a typical question I’d ask the sailors might be: What are the names of the daughter in Balzac’s classic, “Pere Goriot”?

DR. SHAPIRO
Oh, I know that. Delphine and… (SEARCHING) Oh, come on, Evelyn, you know this.

MRS. SHAPIRO
I’m not helping you.

KARL
Wait a minute. I know Balzac, that…

BEVERLY SHOOTS HIM A LOOK.

KARL
I’ll get Isabel.

KARL CROSSES UP THE HALL.

At this point Karl must put out several other comic fires.

MOMENTS LATER

BEVERLY’S IMAGINATION IS KICKING IN. SHE’S UP ON HER FEET AND GETTING SWEPT UP INTO TH FANTASY.

BEVERLY
There’s a certain freedom to being up on that stage naked, moving, giving yourself to the moment, to the music, to your body. And knowing that you – that shy little girl from Fort Wayne, Indiana – are driving all of those men absolutely mad. That they can look all they want but they can not touch.

DR. SHAPIRO HAS A GRIN ON HIS FACE THAT STRETCHES ALL THE WAY BACK TO PALO ALTO. MRS. SHAPIRO, ON THE OTHER HAND, DOES NOT.

MRS. SHAPIRO
You know, this is the latest Aaron’s been out in a while. And we’ve got a long drive back.

SHE PULLS HIM TO HIS FEET.

DR. SHAPIRO
Aw, I can sleep when I’m dead.

MRS. SHAPIRO
Aaron…

DR. SHAPIRO
I was just –

KARL ENTERS FROM THE HALL TO HEAR:

MRS. SHAPIRO
(EMPHATIC) Aaron, we’re leaving now!

KARL
What? Wait! No!

KARL RUNS TO THE FRONT DOOR.

MRS. SHAPIRO
Thank you for an interesting evening.

DR. SHAPIRO
Oh, goodnight.

MRS. SHAPIRO EXITS.

KARL
Wait! Don’t leave!

DR. SHAPIRO
Can I say something?

KARL FREEZES.

DR. SHAPIRO
I must admit I had my doubts about whether you were Stanford material. But as the evening unfolded I changed my mind. I’d love to see you and especially your wife at our next pool party.

KARL
Thank you. That means a lot.

DR. SHAPIRO EXITS. KARL TURNS TO BEVERLY.

KARL
We did it! He wants us!

BEVERLY
He wants me.

KARL
Who cares? We’re on our way!

KARL GRABS BEVERLY AND KISSES HER – THE MOST PASSIONATE KISS THEY’VE HAD IN A LONG TIME.

BEVERLY
(IMPRESSED) Oooh, Karl. You haven’t kissed me like that in years.

KARL
(EQUALLY IMPRESSED) And you. You’ve never kissed me like that.

BEVERLY
Well, let’s say this evening was … liberating. Want to go try out the gris-gris bag (Clay’s voodoo gift to improve their sex life)? Clay said put it under the pillow and good things happen.

THEY BEGIN PASSIONATELY KISSING AGAIN, AS THEY CROSS UP THE HALLWAY:

KARL
Clay… He’s a good boy, isn’t he?

FADE OUT.